It’s been a few weeks since my last blog post and I can tell you it’s been an ‘interesting’ few weeks.

To recap, I ran Gower 50 Ultra on Oct 1st. I then used Oct to concentrate on recovery and health in preparation for body conditioning in Nov-Jan. All ready for when Paris Marathon training starts in Jan.

It all went tits up.

OK, not quite. Oct went well. I slept, ate healthily, low intensity runs etc. then November happened. My fella was admitted to hospital with Sepsis with Pneumonia (scary shit) then as he started to recover, I fell ill.

Cue 2 weeks of coughing, averaging 2 hrs sleep a night, stomach bug, weight loss and generally feeling ‘meh’. Needless to say the body conditioning of strength work and cardio (and diet) went out the window. I even had to have time of work!

This germ infestation resulted in some very random and down-right stupid thoughts:

  • I can’t run…ever! I shall never be able to run again. I may as well give up
  • I am getting really fat (ignores 4kg weight loss)
  • I’ll never be able to run Paris marathon, let alone the 2 day 96 mile event in July as clearly being ill for 2 weeks means a complete loss of all fitness from which you shall never recover
  • I don’t actually like running
  • People suck
  • Gets bored very easily and so signs up for another ultra. 5 minutes later I refer back to point 1, 3 and 4
  • Throws all my bling from the last 2 years in a box and gets hidden in the wardrobe. Yes it’s still there.
  • Sudden inspiration of putting my name on the list for the Grand2Grand ultra in 2018. A 172 mile 5 day event in the States. Cue points 1, 3 and 4.
  • Sneaky smile I’ve lost 4kg but then panic that it’s all muscle loss
  • People suck (yes this thought gets repeated)
  • Browses online sport shops….constantly. Refuse to buy anything due to points 1, 3 and 4
  • Buys  stuff 5 minutes later
  • Start planning stupidly hilly routes on my OS maps then completely forgets how to use a compass. Heads out anyway.
  • Becomes obsessed over MFP and logging everything I eat and drink

I am going to blame (most of) the above on a lack of sleep and a state of zombie delirium setting in.

What I have learnt from these past few weeks?

  • Well, emotional stress really does affect you. It can run you down and if you are not careful, you can become very ill yourself.
  • Never criticize your sporting performance without looking at your life, and the stresses that come with it.
  • Where you are now fitness/performance wise can very rarely be compared to a past event/time. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
  • Lack of sleep makes you weird
  • If you find yourself in a situation in which you need to care for someone, don’t forget to care for yourself too.


Thankfully I am now on the road to recovery. I am eating again, sleep is normal and I can even do some running. The runs are slow but I don’t care, I’m just happy to be out. I guess I do like running after all.